An exercise in nothingness

Hmm...weird titile for a post ,but guess what ?? Thats what i have been upto for the past few days i.e. nothing.people have this weird conception that doing nothing adn lazing on your butt is very easy as easy as falling off a log if not easier.I am here to shatter the myth.
Have you,all of those hard working people out there given a thought to what it takes to do nothing,u must all think its easy ,just lie in a spot and vegetate.Thats not it .To really do nothing takes a huge lot o work i mean just try lying in a place doing or atleast trying to do nothing,u will find a zillion thoughts crowding into your head.Suddenly a million things which need your attention creeps into your mind and each one offering more dire consequences than the last if you dont attend to them and they drive you nuts and you get back to working your ass off.
Apart form that you have to spend considerable amount of energy behind those who would disturb you from your blessed reverie.You have to lie ,brainwash,hide and do god knows what to maintain your sang-froid and spend your time whiling it away.
So next time when you all feel that wasting time requires no work at all stop and give it a thought.Till next post .
ciao.

White Dreams :Second Step

The first time with her was kinda difficult like everyone's first time.She burnt my insides but gave me an awesome high,the likes of which i had never experienced before.So i started in my second time , i chose an open space this time.I was on the terrace of a building ,it was nightime the sky was filled with stars looking down upon me as if to observe what my second time would do to me.The wind actually picked up as i took her in my arms or was it my imagination.

I absorbed her into my being , iwas on fire .My senses reeled ,she recognised me and welcomed me into her deadly embrace ,filling my bland life with her colors the all pervading whitness of a corpses shroud encompassing the colours of the world in its core. I dont know what happened ,when i came out of her grasp i was back in my room dont know how i reached there.Sometime later a friend of mine comes to my room and blasts me for what i had been doing.I try to be innocent but her signs are clearly visible she had marked me.

I come to know that i was singing "Scooby Dooby Doo where are you " interspersed with "I am so high that i am flying " and i was takin steps towards the ledge of terrace.My friend god bless him had come in and dragged me away from there ,only a step had remained between the sky and me. I survived my second encounter thoroughly chastised by all.I pretended to give her up while in reality i was burning for touch again.

So ends my second fling with her .

Breaking free

I always wanted to change the rains.

I always wanted to quit on a Monday morning.

I always wanted to swim with the dolphins.

I always wanted to go on a 1 year trip....around the world

I always wanted to ......................................................................

So goes the ad for Tata Safari Dicor.In my opininon one of the slickest ad's around on t.v. and a really hard hitting one.I mean what do i want to do??????What did i want to do?? and finally What did i end up doing?? These are few of the questions which fill my mind whenever i see this ad. I like this so much that i have actually recorded it and see it when i feel lost or confused or whatever.....

So what do i want to do? I want to be myself,i want to break free of the emotional baggages which are holding me back.I want a stable and meaningful realtionship with the girl i am madly in love with,i want to marry her and grow old with her.I want to do ........so much.What have i done? Nothing ,all this time i have just sat around twiddling my thumbs why? cos i was scared , i was shy ,i was a lot of things but myself.

How many times do we just sit things out instead of just taking the one step towards our dreams which is the only thing which is the key to realsising them.Why do we just let things go because of what people ,our family or some distant dumbfuck sitting on a pedestal with the power to bring us down might not think that what we want to do is not right.

Why and how long is this going to go on. I atleast have my dreams atleast i know what iwant to do and god knows may be one day i will find the conviction and strength to actually go ahead and do them, but what about you all what do you all want to do? and what have done in order to do it .

Tell me about them.Untill the day i do what i wanted to ,follow my dreams i have the copy of the ad to drive me on .What about you all????

What do you all want to do ????????????

Hey there everyone,so am a few posts old hmm...well by profession i am an enginneer basically that means a geek.Well in deference to all my fellow geeks i present over here the one and only song to ever understand us geeks and actually make us feel like well "super-heroes".Well some of you might not agree but what the hell ,this is my blog and i guess i can do whatever bits of lunacy i feel like .So people please give a hand for "Superhero" by the one and only Parikrama ( hey i just provide the lyrics down below,buy the cd/cassette if u want to hear how it sounds you cheapskate)

Superhero

Springs up from the bed with a crossword in his head,
A shiver shakes his spine thinking what the boss said,
Feeling like a mouse in the tiger’s den (ah right)
Missed the bus again, runs all the way to work,
Prays to all his Gods, even Captain Kirk,
Hoping he can make it in time for the bumpy ride.

(Pre-chorus)
Opens all the windows, as he shuts the door,
As the magic begins to flow, out to the fore

(Chorus)
He’s no less than a super hero
can’t make him fall
Ones and zeroes, threes and fours
But not that bad a guy after all

Afternoon comes when everyone eats,
Staring down at lines on his L.C.D screen,
Cracking up the code, faster than the speed of light.

Evening bells ringing, had to meet his date,
Digits on his hand will have to make her wait,
Smiles at his phone, then tosses it aside.

(Pre-chorus)
Opens all the windows, as he shuts the door,
As the magic begins to flow, out to the fore

(Chorus)
He’s no less than a super hero
Can’t make him fall
Ones and zeroes, threes and fours
But not that bad a guy after all.

One hot babe aint she,but someone i wouldnt ever mess with

Warcraft the goddamned best game i liked.i mean it was high up there on that special place i have in my mind......until NEVERWINTER NIGHTS came and displced it.But i still love the visuals of the game .Try it if you havent already

Its true you fuck around with it and it in turn fucks you

White Dreams:The Beginning,Chap.1

It all started as a cure for a bout of depression.What was i depressed about? life in general,was feeling sorry for myself so i set forward on the path which is to serve as the source of my "white dreams".First of all people dont go into drugs or any kind of substance abuse.They are very easy to get hooked onto and damn tough to leave,trust me i speak from personal experience.

So i picked up the stuff and used it,got a huge kick.I was listening to music at that time.Seemed like reality was bending around me.The music in my ears started to get distorted,it trailed away.My head started filling up with innumerable images.Images of people and places and evernts sprouted up.Images from my past ,others from the depest recesses of my mind.

I saw explosions in the sky.My 4X4 room dint exist anymore,i was beyond the reaches of conventional time and space it seemed at that time.The sky was lit up with fireworks like those on 4th of july.I could feel the brightly coloured lights of the fire crackers wash down upon me,i could hear the bang they made as they burst and chased each other in the sky .It was a thing of beauty,and as suddenly it had started the vision faded.Vision ??? yes vision it was ,dredged up from my memory a scene which had affected me very much sometime in the past.

Thus ended my first experience with her,yup i am calling the substance which i had used as a feminine entity cos only females had managed to affect me so before.So out of defrence to the fairer sex i called the stuff her.
It just left me craving for more.

Dreams, what are they ? According to freud they are the manifestations of our repressed desires.Desires which we hide because we feel that they might not be accepted by the norms of our so called civilised society.
Ever had any hallucinations? I know i had when i was expanding the limits of my conciousness by mind altering substances.I had a few that were a doozy.I am gonna start a series of articles describing a few of my hallucinations of those days , atleast the ones i remember . And i shall name the series "White Dreams".
So lets see what all you people think of it.

Well,well,well. The start of a new blog,a new search for my identity.A new beginning.A new let down.In all practicalities a whole new me.Who am i??Well some might say an insginificant speck in the grand order of things,well i would say i am me.To elaborate i am deadlystrings,a name dripping with danger,with a threat?maybe a defense against getting hurt.i just dont know.
Sometimes i wonder about the chat id's people have.Is is an extension of their personalities which they bring onto this virtual world, or is it an escapist's prerogative,trying to be something in this web of people which he cant be in the real world.
All of you out there who might or might not read this i ask you, what made you think of your chat name as it is???